Monday, June 21, 2004

Just a spoonful of tourist crap

  • You know those little spoons they sell at tourist traps everywhere that have state seals or an outline of the state on the handle? A few years ago, my mother decided that she was going to start collecting the spoons and started with Pennsylvania.
    Then, a few weeks ago, I noticed the spoon being used as a sugar spoon.
    "Where are your other state spoons?" I asked my mother.
    "Oh, I gave up on that idea," she said. "I don't go enough places."
    "Mom, have you ever even been to Pennsylvania?"

  • I am a manly man. This weekend I changed the spark plugs in both my wife's car and my truck, changed the oil in both vehicles (along with oil filters and air filters), put in new plug wires in my wife's car and rotated the tires on my truck.
    And when I say that I did all that, I mean that my brother actually did all the plugs and wires, and his friend, Matt, directed me on where to place the jack and helped me figure out where the oil pan was under my wife's car.
    But my hands still got dirty, and that makes me very, very manly indeed.

  • Congratulations England on yet another football (soccer) victory. This is the first time -- on foreign soil -- that England has progressed to the quarterfinal round of the Euro championship. It was a very good match.

  • I wonder how hard you'd get punched if you were to attend an England football match and sing the lyrics to "My Country 'tis of Thee" while they sang "God Save The Queen."

  • Speaking of queens, they're dangerous! Oh, different sort of queen.

  • One of the interesting side effects of my copy editing gig comes when I read quotes from random Americans that force me to admit that many of us make absolutely no sense when we speak: "Just the other day I was on my way to work and everybody's speeding because everybody is slow." Huh?

  • Hooray! We're all going to space! Well, maybe not all of us.

  • "One African screamed wildly into a cell phone and ran around as colleagues tried to restrain him." -- I suspect he was screaming something to the effect of: "I love Spain! This is even better than I could have hoped."
  • 1 comment:

    Chris Cope said...

    And what was with this random bit of information in the Spain story:

    "A group of bathers was shown gathered around one of the infants, gently counting the fingers on one of its hands and coming up with six."