Thursday, July 1, 2004

You need a new dog

  • Driving to the office this morning, I encountered a woman who was standing in the street with her dog. As I inched my truck toward her, I realized that the dog was on one of those leads that people use for seeing-eye dogs.
    But this dog had her standing in the middle of the street.
    I moved past her and then pulled to the side of the road to go and guide her out of that street. Fortunately, by that time another man was helping her to the sidewalk and all I heard of his conversation was this: "I think you need to get your money back."
    I assume he was talking about the dog.

  • Apparently, Viagra can give you indigestion. I'm sure that's what every woman wants: a farty, horny old man.

  • "No healthy breakfast begins with mercury." -- Yeesh. Picky, picky.

  • Isn't it a bit late to hold an anti-slavery march? Missed that one by just 142 years, fellas. While you're at it, be sure to demand women's suffrage and lobby for an end to feudalism.

  • Oh man, that is just not right.

  • Remember Dodgy? They had that one song: "If it's good enough for you then it's good enough for me. If it's good enough for two something something something eee."
    Ok, you probably don't remember them, but I do and have added their album to my sprawling Amazon wish list.
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