Tuesday, August 31, 2004

Darn you, Canada, darn you all to heck

  • This morning, when my alarm went off promptly at 7:30, I found myself trapped in a dream in which the sound of my alarm was a signal from a powerful shadowy force that I could not yet get out of bed. I really wanted to get out of bed, but each time I would make an attempt, the alarm would go off and I knew that I was being commanded to bury my head in my pillow a few more minutes.
    What nefarious force would keep me from getting up and starting my day?
    And I found myself lying in bed thinking: "Why would the Canadians do this to me? I like Canada. Leave me alone, Canada."

  • New weapon of terror: Uncle Earl.

  • Meet America's newest proponent of a ban on pit bulls.

  • You know, if a bear puts forward this much effort in an escape, you should just let him go. Free Juan!

  • Ever watched a commercial and liked the music? You may be able to find out what song was used by looking here.

  • What makes America great? Corn mazes.

  • One of my favorite rugby players is bringing his international career to an end. Dallaglio is the reason I wanted to become a flanker, despite the fact that I am physically better suited to be a back. Actually, I am physically better suited to swimming or foosball, but you get the point. Dallaglio rocks -- I wish I could be like him, except with more hair.

  • In related news, could the coach that helped deliver England's Rugby World Cup victory do the same for the nation's soccer team?
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