"Whoa, I'm an ugly dude."
Ever have one of those days? When you just happen to glance in the mirror and think: What the hell happened there? I am one aesthetically unpleasant mutha.
Last night, my wife asked if I thought she would still be attractive when she's 40. She doesn't drink or smoke, as a master's degree in healthy eating, and works out no less than four times a week. I'm guessing she'll look just fine. Me, on the other hand... What in the world was my wife thinking in marrying me? What a horrible investment I've turned out to be.
Yeesh. Don't these people have Christmas shopping to do? That's what we do after elections -- begrudgingly accept the result and hotfoot it to IKEA.
I'll bet it was "fun." Thanks for bringing pride to the family name, Nate.
Bono sings: "And there'll be no cheese in Vermont this Christmas."
A bazooka? Do people just have those lying around?
Consuming the same product over and over again seems to be pretty popular these days. I would like to point out that I did it first. But with Guinness.