Sunday, April 3, 2005

Somewhere there's a plastic puck with my name on it

I have been informed that the air hockey community is very upset with a remark I made in a previous post (the remark has since been removed because I'm a wuss who doesn't particularly enjoy conflict).

Some of the comments I received:
  • "Your blog is disgusting."
  • "Shut down your blog now."
  • "Your comments will give others the wrong impression of our comparatively wholesome sport."
  • "...we find your message a case of Bloody Ignorance*."

    Ignoring the irony and humor of my drawing the ire of the air hockey community, I extend to them a whole-hearted apology and suggest that they explore one of the other 36 million blogs that currently exist on Ye Olde Internet.

    Indeed, I extend the same invitation to any of you who may take offense with my blatant pro-Welsh leanings and links to stories about bathtub cheese. This is not journalism. Although I work for the Global Media Conspiracy I make no claim to be upholding the standards of truth, integrity and fairness on this insignificant corner of the Internet.

    If you are easily offended by strong language or concepts you should click away now. You may also want to shut off your computer and board up your home, because there are far ruder people than me out there.

    I'm just shocked that this has happened. Why, some of my best friends are in the air hockey community. Besides, everybody knows that the real threat comes from people who are into curling.

    *Good name for a band: Bloody Ignorance

    Charlotte said...

    This is kinda embarassing, but I lost a tooth playing air hockey once. We have a picture of it somewhere...

    Shawn D. Mickschl said...

    Wow, taunted by air hockey jocks!

    I could understand there might be cause for concern if you had made some sort of comment about those in the dart throwing world.

    Personally, I think the people who wrote to you were the guys who tore a ligament in their wrist in college and couldn't make it to the P.A.H.L.

    Come on people! It is AIR HOCKEY!

    OldHorsetailSnake said...

    This is nothing, Chris. I got reamed, tortured and flayed for making fun of air quotes. How to win friends and flatulate people.

    Jenny said...

    What? I can't believe I missed all this.

    Hey, Charlotte is pretty foxy.

    James said...

    My heart goes out to you, Mr. Cope. I will offer a word of advice: do not make comments about mouth harps or the players thereof, either. All three of them who possess internet access will descend upon you most rabidly, and they will inundate your email account with utterly incomprehensibly written pejoratives. Upon reading one of them, you will spend the remainder of your day drifting aimlessly through the mechanical process of living, horribly sure that you have been cut to the quick, but entirely incapable of articulating precisely how it has occurred. It is a living death, sir, and I beg of you, for the sake of your sanity and your pride, leave the mouth harps be!

    Charlotte said...

    I am, aren't I?

    Another bit of advice: Leave comments regarding accordian players at the door as well. Or at least remember that your mother plays one from time-to-time and make sure she isn't within earshot when you make your comments.

    Cheekysquirrel said...

    I used to play air hockey but wanted something with more substance.

    I moved onto water hokey but the medium still wasn't hard enough.

    Ice hockey although hard was rather cold so I ditched it for hot air hockey. The extreme spot that involves a puck, a stick, giant baloons and a load of hot air off the interwebnet. Try it today!

    Curly said...

    Not a big Air-Hockey fan, always seem to get hurt - who plays pro AH anyways?!

    Funny blog mate - intrigued as to where your interest in all things Welsh comes from? Not many Americans (that I've spoken to...) even know that Wales exists. There are even plenty of English that don't know that Cymraeg is still widely spoken!

    Was on a train from Sheffield last year and a couple of young girls were talking behind me - I overheard one of them say in a 'spooky story' tone;

    "Did you know that the last person to speak Welsh died two years ago...?"

    Chris Cope said...

    OK, no talk about air hockey, mouth harps, air quotes, or accordion players. And just to be safe, we should probably also avoid any slander of pogo stick enthusiasts.