Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Stop hitting me; vote Labour

  • Note to self: Read your work schedule.
    Failure to do this will result in having to work an additional two hours on a day when you really didn't want to show up in the first place.

  • I realized today that when Britain holds its election next week, it will be the first election since 1997 that I will not be in the country. Perhaps, to ensure a third victory, Blair should fly me out there.
    Has anyone else noticed that when Blair defends his policy he sounds a lot like that kid on the bus who is being bullied: "Why are you hitting me? What did I do to you?"

  • As part of the duties performed for my benevolent employer, I read and reply to more than 250 e-mails a day. As such, this is bad news for me.
    (Thanks Diego for the link)

  • I think my wife and I deserve some sort of prize for the fact that we burn through a bag of Dutch Crunch kettle chips every week.

  • I spent a lot of my day Monday listening to Van Morrison's "Into the Music" CD. It arrived in the mail this morning from Amazon.
    This one included, I own 14 Van Morrison CDs. And I realize that saying this makes me 59 years old, but he is -- across the board -- my favorite musician. Van Morrison's music helped me score with my wife when all my other attempts to woo her had failed. But any Van Morrison aficionado can tell you that I am woefully lacking when it comes to Van Morrison's discography. There are still 20 releases that remain unbought on my part. That's because Van Morrison is sort of the Babe Ruth of music. Ruth hit a lot of homeruns, but he also struck out a hell of a lot. Similarly, Van Morrison has plenty of songs that will score you sweet, sweet lovin', but he also put out "Inarticulate Speech of the Heart." As such, I am always cautious in my purchases of Van Morrison CDs. After listening to this one three times I would say that it was worth the money. There are two songs that stroll dangerously close to crap fence, but he makes up for it with the other tracks, one of which is of nookie-making quality.
    Van Morrison's "Into the Music" was released in 1979. Tune in next week for more album reviews that are 26 years late.

  • Actual AIM conversation:
    CO-WORKER: Experts Declare National Tire Safety Week
    CW: i'm taking the rest of the week off!
    CW: paaaaaaarrrrrtayyyyyyyyyy
    ME: Yeah. I love Tire Safety Week!
    CW: me too. i'm almost done with my parade float
    ME: I got soooooooo drunk at a Tire Safety Week party last year. It was nuts.
    CW: that was you on top of all those tires?
    ME: Hell yeah!
    CW: aw man, that was the awesome
    ME: I just wish they would make it National Tire Safety Month. Dude, that'd be fuckin' awesome!
    CW: i'd quit this job, dude

    Chicken Legs, Twm and The Kid said...

    Chris, I've never been a Van Morrission fan at all. The one time that I met him in the flesh he came across as a bit of a grump. However, yesterday I found this little nugget. Check out http://www.ubu.com/outsiders/365/03-1.html and scroll down to the MARCH 5/#064 entry. The Mp3 is great.

    Anonymous said...

    You notice the subhead on the Tire Safety Week article: "Good Tire Maintenence (sic) Can Reduce Gas Milage (sic)". Other than the spelling, I thot the point was to IMPROVE "gas milage." Little did I know.