Monday, June 20, 2005

Why is there air?

  • I got my first moving violation citation in eight years Saturday. I turned right on a red light, despite "at least four" signs telling me not to. I was going to argue with the officer on this point when I looked in the rearview mirror and saw two of said signs. That's $115 for not paying attention to the road because I was too busy insulting my wife for not liking Bill Cosby.
    Honestly, though, how can you not like Bill Cosby?
    I can understand not ranking him in your top 20 favorite comics, and I can understand not enjoying other people's interpretations of him (I want to punch every person who attempts to regurgitate the "Dad is great; he gives us chocolate cake" routine) but to not like him at all? It's the Cos for the love of Pete! There's clearly something wrong with my wife. It's some sort of horrible psychological disorder that I fear will manifest itself in an attack that comes in my sleep.

  • "One half of the couple was asked to lie down, with their head inside a scanner, while their partner stimulated them manually to achieve orgasm."
    Ooh. Kinky.

  • "I think there's a very good chance I wouldn't have survived 15 hours without it," Hannon said.
    I like the optimism there. He doesn't rule out the possibility of coming through it all just fine without a life preserver, like that episode of "Magnum P.I." when Magnum has to tread water for 24 hours and suffers visions of his father.
    (Come on, who's seen this episode?)

    Dave Morris said...

    Gotta tell you - Cosby is not my favorite. I don't DISLIKE him, it's more of an apathy. He feels just a little contrived.

    Yes, that Magnum episode seems familiar. That's all I'm saying.

    Chris Cope said...

    I should have clarified and said that I am mostly a fan of his stand-up from the 60s and early 70s.

    OldHorsetailSnake said...

    Is there any tipoff when a man fakes an orgasm?

    Cheekysquirrel said...

    I've heard of these US red light rules and I have to say its stupid.

    In the UK red means stop, end of story.

    It does not mean stop unless you want to go right, unless a sign says you can't go right, unless its full moon and a tuesday in which case you can ignore the sign providing you carrying your mother-in-law and smell of german cheese.

    Red, Danger, Stop, Period.

    Its easy to remember and leaves no margin for misunderstanding.

    When my mother visited the states she was told off by the police for not going through a red light. She didn't know the 'you are allowed to go through red light' rule and didn't smell of cheese.