Nice. First curling medal for the United States, won against the people who invented the game. That's a bit like what will happen when we beat England in the World Cup semifinals*.
Which reminds me: I know I have drawn attention to the assclown Bear in the Big Blue House-esqe World Cup mascot lion before, but I want to again. Actually, there are two mascots: Goleo VI, the mascot with "silky skills;" and Pille, the cheeky little football. I'm personally amused by the obvious anti-French jokes and Photoshop potential of this picture.
Where did the rest of the world get the idea that goofy little mascots are necessary for major sporting events? For once, you can't blame the United States for this. For all our over-the-top lack of irony in everything we do, there is no cutesy Super Bowl mascot. There is no Homerus the World Series Bear.
Some mascots are better than others. Neve and Gliz -- the mascots for the 2006 Olympics -- are completely outdone by Beibei, Jingjing, Huanhuan, Yingying and Nini, the mildly disturbing anime clan known as the Friendlies. The Beijing 2008 mascots so nice they named 'em twice. If I were a Friendly, my name would be Chrischris. Wow. Just saying that makes me sound cuter.
My favorite Friendly is Jingjing the Death Panda. He's a bad mutha-panda. Despite Jingjing's insatiable appetite for violence, Huanhuan is the one to look out for. You mess with her and your shit is going to get kicked in the fuck. A gun and a sword and she's made of fire -- that is the John L. Sullivan. Do not mess with her.
That said, I think I am making Jingjing the Death Panda the official mascot of this blog. I want that shooting picture on a T-shirt. No, really. Does anyone know how I can make a T-shirt featuring Jingjing the Death Panda?
Good name for a band: Death Panda
Does anyone watch basketball anymore?
Random co-worker quote: "Give me a bowl of hushpuppies swimming in buttermilk, then I'll wash it down with a bottle of Southern Comfort."
*Yes, I know. It's a stretch to think that England will advance to the semifinals.