Thursday, June 8, 2006

Grody to the max

  • Do you think anyone ever actually used the word "grody?" When I was a kid, the word was used when imitating a valley girl, but I don't think I ever heard anyone use the word in seriousness.

  • The child bride has a sort of "mad woman" trait that she picks up from her mother. Occasionally she will burst into a flurry of frustration-induced activity and attack the source of the frustration with the sort of vigor one would expect in a Disney cartoon.
    This morning she found ants crawling near her bed stand. After squealing for several minutes -- "Where are these ants COMING FROM?!" -- she decided to attack them with the vacuum cleaner. She vacuumed for about 15 minutes, the whole time yelling obscenities at the ants. Needless to say, the ants were back a few hours later.

  • Note to dumb asses on motorcycles: If you're kind of stupid and don't know how to ride your bike properly, you are no longer allowed to ride anywhere where my wife can see you.
    Tuesday night, Rachel and I were out enjoying the evening and a guy dropped his bike right in front of us. He had been leaning into a curve as if he were in Superbike, hit gravel and got to enjoy sliding across the pavement. Apart from his pride and some minor road rash, he wasn't hurt (which emphasizes the stupidity of his leaning on the curve -- he couldn't have been going more than 20 mph). He got back up right away and hopped back on his bike.
    As he sat there trying to restart his bike so he could escape the scene of his shame, Rachel said: "That's why you can't own a motorcycle."
    Bastard. From now on, only the safest of motorcycle riders are allowed to be within eyesight of my wife. And once they are stopped, they are not allowed to ever talk about speed or crazy drivers they have to contend with. They are only allowed to talk about how much money they save on gas and their ease in finding a place to park.

  • Subject line of a spam e-mail I received today: "Eat not to dullness, drink not to elevation." I'm not sure what that means, but it sure sounds profound.
    You know, for a guy who doesn't have a job (how many more times can I mention this fact? I must point it out every 15 minutes), I haven't been drinking to elevation. Very strangely, I have become Action Guy. Tuesday I biked about 15 miles, today I biked about 10 miles and kayaked around a lake.

  • I mentioned that Blogger is ass, didn't I? Because they are.

    tuckmac said...

    Two things...

    YES Blogger is an ass... I had a double post today that I couldn't get rid of... And I was not impressed...

    And second: Try "returning from Britain" and not being employed. My friend... You have NO idea!

    Word from the wise (yeah, whatever):

    Stay in Britain.

    Just a piece of advice from a "returnee" from the 'Old Country'.

    Okay... Don't be as bitter as I seem to be...

    Ignore all of this comment... I've had about seven Jameson's and I know not what I do...


    Neal said...

    Blogger is indeed, ass. You should start a campaign to have their logo changed to butt crack.

    Tell your wife that everyone in the UK drives a motorcycle and you'll need one once you arrive. If I made a top ten list of things I miss from back home, #1, 4, 7 & 9 would be my motorcycle.

    Anonymous said...

    This is why you should not own a motorcycle or perhaps it's why you should. HST's Song of the Sausage Creature.

    lfc said...

    i totally use the word grody all the time. in fact, it's probably in some of my postings. but i'm a little valley that way... i also use "totally", "gay-wad" (as in a wad of gayness) and "rad" (actually, i don't use rad, but i've been trying to bring it back... it hasn't worked yet.)

    Curly said...

    Blogger is ass.

    I may have used the word 'Grody' when I've been completely drunk and tried telling everyone to 'get ready.

    Me! said...

    I admit it. I still use the word "Grody" and have in the past even uttered the phrase "grody to the max". So of course I giggled a little on the inside when I saw your title. Fond memories of using the phrase "Gag me with a dead Smurf" are also entering my head at the moment.