Monday, January 29, 2007

Girl, we couldn't get much better

The other day I was listening* to "This Ain't A Scene" by the insufferable Fall Out Boy and I was struck by how much of a prude I am. Beyond its cookie-cutter nature and bubble-gum-angst lyrics the thing that bothers me most about the song is the fact that they shout "Goddamn" over and over and over.

Hey, I'm as big a fan of blasphemy as any other, but, I can't help thinking: "Cripes, is this appropriate for daytime radio?"

It's clear I'm getting old that I find myself thinking about the possibility of there being some mother out there, taking their child to school and scrambling to hit the "scan" button when that song comes on. Who needs that? No one wants to discuss the third commandment with a child that early in the morning. Suddenly, painfully, the necessity of Radio Disney becomes clear. Goddamn you, Fall Out Boy, for making Radio Disney seem like a good idea.

I've always been this way, though. This morning Radio 1 was randomly playing "500 Miles" by the Proclaimers** and I flashed back to high school, when our flag corps (we had a flag corps; you know we were bad-ass) performed a routine to that song. Keep in mind that I am not that old but that I lived in the Midwest, so it took several years for the Proclaimers to reach us.

The first time they performed the routine, I found myself listening to the song's lyrics and thinking: "Oh, golly. Is it appropriate that high school girls should be dancing to songs that mention excessive alcohol intake?"

*Please note that I listened to the song only because I was doing the washing up, so my hands were wet and I didn't want to just kick the radio across the room, as perhaps I should have.

**Is it just me, or is Frankie Boyle one of the Proclaimers?


Anonymous said...

Proclaimers also liked to sing about Jesus a lot. They were proclaiming. They just weren't Baptists.

Hated TAASIAGDAR the first time I heard it. Now it's stuck in my brain. I think it's like that song the Cobra forces used against GI Joe.

~the editor

Neal said...

If it wasn't for excessive drinking, there would be no dancing. I think that makes it appropriate for girls to dance to that song.

Dave Morris said...

Thank God for dancing and drinking.

That's a little blasphemous too, but I'm prepared for hell.

I smiled broadly at the use of the word "cripes."

Curly said...

I'm sure most people are completely obvlivious to the words anway.

No-one knows any of the words (, apart from the chorus) to '500 miles' - that's a fact.

Melissa said...

Wow. I had completely confused the Proclaimers with the Pretenders. I wondered why I didn't hear Chrissie Hynde singing, but figured she'd taken a night off and it never stopped me from looking for 500 Miles on the jukebox under The Pretenders. I can say that I have a much better grasp of the lyrics than I did of the band name.

David T. Macknet said...

It's just that the world's twisted, Chris. Not to worry: you can see graphic depictions of murder on daytime TV, but nothing close to sex. Which one's more likely to happen to you? Which one would you like to consider normal?

Is it, perhaps, that since you're in a different culture you're re-examining your values? Heh heh. Pretty soon you're going to like poetry or something.